January 6, 2012
Yesterday was a heavy-heart day. Even though the events occurred yesterday, they've been little seeds of gratefulness growing in my heart all day. Of course, my family would be at the top of my gratitude list but I'm waiting for the Lord to show me the characters that He's instilled in each of them for His Glory. My oldest daughter, Emma, is twelve but could probably pass for sixty-seven. You know, the oldest girl-child; stoic, introverted, dependable, responsible, a thinker, not much ruffles her feathers. Not exactly the life of the party-clone of mother, not father. The area of her life that needs, ummm well, growing is that of mercy, compassion and grace. As she recently said during family discussion of last year's growth and this year's character pursuits, "I guess I need to just leave grace and compassion on this year's list as well." Emma has a tendency to hold people at a distance while she ponders whether it's safe to let someone close. She's also that kid in a group that's easier to ignore. You have to purpose to pursue Emma and four years ago a special dance teacher chose to do just that. Yesterday that dance teacher tearfully told Emma that she was moving back home to a state far away. Emotions are not Emma's specialty but those tears couldn't be contained. After we cried together and talked a bit, she disappeared to do her nails. I thought that a bit strange as it's been months since she's given herself a manicure. That night she danced and cried and said good-bye to an amazing lady who saw those seeds of kindness and tenderness that God planted in a quiet soul. Later as I was telling Emma good-night, I mentioned that her nails were cute. She said, "Thanks" and then with a small, wistful smile she said, "Ms. Jade gave me that polish......I've been laying here praying for her and her family and it still really hurts." That's it, but it shot through my momma heart. She needed to grieve and she needed to show in a small way just how much she loved a person who took the time to invest in her little life. Often I am a bit hard on her as I want to see a little passion or excitement or something, but the Spirit showed me today that she is His and perfectly made. She is not only my daughter but my sister in Christ and the Lord is at work on the inner parts of her heart just as He draws me to Himself daily. She may not be that kid that gathers all the attention (I've got one of those as well) but she ponders and she thinks and she's asked the Lord to give her mercy and a tender-heart. Thank you, Lord, for making my daughter one of your children and I praise you for bringing to fruition the verse we prayed over her at birth, "Grow in the grace and knowledge of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. To him be the glory both now and to the day of eternity." 2 Peter 3:18
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